Working on the Weekends

So I’m sitting here waiting to start my shift at work on a Saturday morning thinking about the world. We all have a thought that someday we will “Make it Big.” Of course Big being subjective, our dreams are always a little different from the next person but revolve around a central theme. We’ll be happy, healthy, and have a home with people we care about. It of course changes up and down the spectrum but that is the basics.

So what do I want for my “Big?” That is a question to which the answer has changed over the years. Before it was to have a good career and live out my life happily. Now it’s still sort of that, but the details are different. I want a home but I want it somewhere simple, I want a relationship but I don’t know where to go or some such.

I’m mostly working on ideas but never going further then plotting out events and scenes in my mind, I’m also wondering what at the age of 36 I could possibly do that would be of interest. I have to admit, I feel as if my life has stalled at times. Also, when you think of it you see the world, and you see people ten years or more younger then you already retiring, it can get depressing.

So, what does one do then?

One idea is to stay the course, stick it out and try to figure out how to get promoted at your current job and just work slowly there. Lot’s of famous people are in their early to mid-forties and just really getting started. Time isn’t THAT fleeting… at least I hope it isn’t.

The other is to try and pull a J.K. Rowling and try and come up with “The Great American Novel.” This is mostly what I’m trying to do, or at least provide some interesting thoughts folk to read.  I know I’m not exactly a very broad based person, but I do hope I have SOME kind of following.

But first and foremost one must define themselves really, if only who they WANT to be in their heads. The Legend of their own mind. What is our self-image, that person we see ourselves as? Is it some clerk somewhere always working and never getting any further in their lives? Or is it some action hero from the 1980’s? Once one has who they are in their minds, they can start working towards changing that, or enhancing that image into what they are towards everyone else.

So we go from there and start trying to push towards that sort of life. You can have a great life without ending up a famous person. Probably more enjoyable in general that way if you ask me.  We figure out how we want to be remembered, either by those around us or the world at large, or if it’s even worth it. Some of us are very forgettable, myself included in that at times.

But at the end of the day, forgettable or unforgivable, we can define how we want to exist. I would be happy with the stereotypical existence from the 1950’s, at least as it was defined as being a family, a house, and a stable livelihood. Even if the details have changed, the basics haven’t.

One day, one day.